inner demonds

I recently found out that a kid I went to school with was diagnosed with cancer after serving a two year lds mission in new york city. He started a blog sharing his thoughts as he goes through this journey. In one of his blog post he mentions about how he feels we all have some form of "cancer" to over come. I thought I would share my feelings of my "cancer" that I am trying to over come. 

 As I've mentioned in several of my post that i'm a young women married and taking care of our first born. That being said I feel like that has come with several insecurities. It's hard living in the world where a "perfect picture" is just photoshop away. It's hard for me to post whats really going on behind the picture because you don't want  people to judge you for the vulnerabilities or judge you. I've thought a lot about the mother I have become to my daughter and I always imagine what kind of life I want her to live and the young women I hope for her to become one day. The person I am is the person who sees these beautiful women with the perfect bodies,  the friends moving to different states, building houses, buying expensive things. It's hard not to want all of that and to be jealous of your friends like that but the mother in me wants to teach my precious daughter and future children that its okay to think you are beautiful, and it's okay to the person you want to be, Its okay not to have all the material things that are only going to last you in this life time. Because there is always going to be someone out there who doesn't agree with you or has something better than you.  Beauty isn't whats on the outside beauty is your heart thats on the inside. Acceptance has always and will always be one of my biggest trials in life and a battle I will face everyday. And thats okay I am going to be me and I like me. We have to rely on people who love you and support us and not those who hurt us and make us feel down on our selves. We all go through something that makes us sad but we can't let that drag us down. I am lucky I have met a man who works so hard for my family who is able to work so I can be a stay at home mom. I am lucky to be a mom at all many people struggle with that and I am lucky and so blessed that I can get pregnant. I am blessed and when you start thinking about all the many things we are lucky and blessed to have suddenly those trials become a little thing. 

 for updates on sean & his cancer check out:sean cancervive